Mum, Dad.....I'm gay

So I've said it. But now I wonder whether I should have said anything at all. The two of them were in the sitting room Sunday night, so I decided to bite the bullet and tell them. The reaction was what I expected, to a certain extent.

My mam started sobbing and got up, repeatedly hugging me. I assumed everything was fine. My dad, said that it was fine, that it was my business and he was glad that I told him. Then the shock ensued - my mam just cried for ages and kept swearing, and she never cries or swears. The "how the fuck do you like men" comment kind of took me by surprise. I told them that I was happy with it, that I was never really unhappy about it, and re-assured them that its not all sleazy in the G (well not all of the time) and that they didn't have to worry about being me "taken advantage of". My mam blamed herself, asking if there was anything that she had done, or did anything happen to me. I tried to explain that I didn't just wake up one day, gay, but that I always have been and always will be. I felt sorry that I had upset her so much.

After my dad went to bed, I stayed up for an hour or so with her, tryin to answer questions that she asked, and trying to make sure she was ok. Then I went to bed and she called into me. She kept crying and apologising if she seemed a bit 'back-ward'. It was awful. She didn't have a bad reaction as such, just an upsetting one, and it upset me even more to see her upset. My brother, to my surprise, took it fine. He was a bit upset that I hadn't been able to tell him before and apologised for it, but I told him it was my fault, that I didn't feel ready to tell him.

Its funny how everyone seemed 'upset for me' and uspet for what my life was going to be like, especially since I've had all the shit going on with my life health-wise etc. Right now Im just emotionally drained! But hopefully things are going to work out.....hopefully.